Do you like loli?
Do you like spin-off anime of excellent series that have nothing to do with said excellent series?
Do you like a show that can’t decide what the hell it wants to be?
Then sit down and watch Fate/Kaleid, a ten episode anime that is full of everything you love about Fate/Zero and Fate/Stay Night, such as hilarious comedy, underaged lesbians, and magical girls. You know, the kind of things fans asked for after watching the main series.
If you are a fan of the series, I’m sure you’re going to pass Kaleid up based upon the fact it is a cutesy magical girl anime. I went into it thinking such, which is why I was so scared after the first episode. I was already debating how a show based on a series that’s pretty adult in tone could appeal to little girls. I went into the series assuming I was going to see a little girl anime. Twenty-seven minutes later, I walked away wondering just who the hell Kaleid was made for. And after ten episodes and the five DVD specials, I’m still scratching my head.
Kaleid is about Illyasviel, a young girl who lives in Japan with some adopted family while her mother and father are out doing…whatever. She watches magical girl anime and dreams of becoming one. Luckily, a magical wand/stick/what-have-you hears her and takes her as its master, making her dream come true. But the wand used to belong to Rin Tohsaka, a tsundere who, along with her partner, lost their wands because all they did was fight with each other. The teenaged girls were tasked with collecting seven cards by the Mage’s Guild if they wanted to be taken under the wing of a master magus. So, through the series, the duo of teenagers use a duo of ten year olds to attain their goals.
Sounds like it could a kids show, right? Nope! One episode and there’s a gag about penis’s! A few episodes in and the violence is a little more intense than a kids show usually is.
And then the realization:
Oh God…this show is supposed to appeal to people my age.
Okay, loli porn aside, I can’t fault the series for having Rin Tohsaka. Because seriously, I watched this for Rin. She’s one of the best damn tsundere’s in anime. Her companion, Luvia, whom she always fights with, is less exciting. Exceptionally less exciting. She’s the rich bitch stereotype. She has that “OH HO HO HO HO” laugh and makes fun of Rin for being poor.
Illya is a decent character but her development can be filed under “Basic Hero”. Wishful thinking to “No, I don’t want this” to acceptance to throwing aside her weapons after something bad happens to taking them back when she realizes she’s the hero the city deserves.
Miyu is another stereotype. Quiet and badass entrance to nothing-to-do-with-hero attitude to learning friendship and working together is a good thing to hurting the hero to finally realizing friendship is magic.
Another gripe, the biggest gripe. What the hell is it? Magical girl, fan service, comedy? It does all three pretty decently, but the problem with the series becomes tonal shifts so fast you’ll get whiplash. One episode will spend half the time making tit jokes and focusing on side characters that have absolutely nothing to do with anything, while the other half will be an intense fight. It has Sword Art Online syndrome. It’s juggling way too many genres and tropes at once and because of that, it’s failing to carve itself a distinctive identity. What we get is a muddled mess.
One overarching theme seems to be exploiting the female characters. This is an anime for lolicons a la Kodomo no Jikan. It’s pretty shameless in how over-sexualized the characters are. The worst offenses come with the DVD extras that includes a whole portion where Illya is dressed up like a cat and being forced into poses that are…not appropriate for a girl her age. And the magic wand (these things talk by the way) tells us that she’s responding to the desires of the audience.
Oh come on! The writer, director, and animators want to blame the viewers for this? We all know it’s a joint venture! The studio’s getting off just as much.
And the DVD extras are bad. Except for Rin in a maid outfit. But otherwise, they’re all useless and more excuses for nudity and sexuality. There’s one where they play strip-Life. The board game. Turned into a stripping game. Eh?
And also, there’s a pervasive sense of lesbianism between Illya and Miyu, just to help that image of underaged fap-bait.
I’m bitching a lot about this show, but I did find some decent aspects to it. It’s watchable and less painful than a lot of shows I’ve seen, but that doesn’t change the fact it’s got so many faults. There are a couple awesome fights within, good animation, and great music. It’s begging for fans of the Fate series to watch it but it’s begging for a lot more besides. It’s…to put it bluntly, fap-bait. If you’re into loli, here you go. If you’re not, well, I wouldn’t even touch this series with a stick. Even if you’re a hardcore fan of the franchise, just don’t. You’ll be a lot happier that way.
4/10
